Syimah'Zara MsBintang @ Blogger
Well, blogmates, this is the guy i'm talking about all these while.
The 2005 love of mine.
Naim or also known as daffy in internet.
I know him through the same job on year 2005 december. He was 19 and i was 16 that moment of time.
He was attached and i was single, but i dunno how sparkle grew between me and him.
He was the sweetest guy i know ever since.
But fate wasn't at our side. He have to leave to serve National Service.
In the same time i wasn't giving so much hope as he was attached to girl for 3 years i guess.
Then on year 2007 december or 2008 january, we bump into each other in the club.
The first thursday we met, we lost touch as it was too crowded. The next thursday, i went over again.
Didnt expect that i would bump into him again. This time we exchange numbers.
I was very happy as you know he was a crush. A special crush.
We contact each other but was titled as "fling" as i myself dunno who am i to him.
I remember 1 nite where i was totally drunk, he was the person whom accompany me back home to my gf's place. He was all by my side till i fell asleep at 7am in the morning. The nxt thing i woke up, he was gone. He went home without informing me. I search him all over the place but he wasn't anywhere to be found. That night we met a nearby blk. If i know, that would be the last time we meet, i would hug him and never let go. How sad. He left.
My messages, calls were un answered. I was left with a question mark.
Few weeks later, i was attached to a guy and got to know he was attached to a girl. Although the hurt was there, i just pray for his happiness and 1 day he would find his true love. Days, weeks, months past. We still didnt talk to each other.
I could still remember, everytime i look at his friendster profile, i would smile. A smile of dissappointment.
He broke up with that girl. He contact me back. But that lasted for just 3 days. That hurts me the most. He didnt reply my messages again and then found out he is attached to another girl through clubbing.
I get the urge of telling him off how he totally make a fool out of me. But i didnt. I just care for hi too much that i myself wouldnt want to hurt him. I just have to accept the fact that he is attached.
Next thing i remember, he send me a comment. He never does that unless he is single. Automatically i knew that he was single. I checked his profile and there goes. I'm right. In the same time me and khairun was very very very shaky.
After me and khairun got worse, we eventually broke up. I had no 1 to talk to. I decided to msg naim. He replied me. But this time, i felt diff. I felt as if, i was talking to another person.
He seem more serious then who he is last time. We msg and suddenly i could see fireworks. K i'm faking again...
We talk about what happen in the past.
I gave up.
Although deep in my heart i do love him, i still need time to think about khairun. I do love khairun. But Naim? I know him for 4 years now. How can i let him go when he was the 1 i waited for so long? Again, i treasure my relationship with khai, but like ppl say, if we are meant for each other, love will always be there...
The time came and i made my decision. Just as when i was about to clarify things up, Khairun made me very dissappointed. You know what you did okey.
My feelings towards khai totally fade off. I lost all my feelings towards him. And now what left is Naim. I don't take him as someone who i would lay back on when my relationship don't work out. I just dunwan to make the same mistake again..
I can't bear to hurt Naim or even lose him again.
Naim is a changed person and i trust him on that. I know that he would take good care of me.
Please make me happy Naim...
Let's just wait for few more weeks, cause that's when he'll make it officiall.
I pray hard that this will work out well this time...
